What to tell your daughter when she tells you she was molested 

1. Show me where it hurts. Take her to the police station, the hospital, report it!
2. I believe you!

3. I love you

4. It wasn’t your fault! It wasn’t your fault!

5. I am sorry. I am sorry I failed you as a parent. I am sorry I brought you here in the land of predators and didn’t protect you from them. 

6. I am sorry I wasn’t with you, I should have been there. 

7. I am sorry he took your innocence. 

8. I believe you

9. Wash her clean!

10. Allow her to weep! Weep with her if you must

11. It’s ok to not know what to do next but don’t tell her shit like God knows why and all that fucked up nonsense. Don’t tell her to forgive and forget! Don’t tell her God is preparing her for some great miracle shit!!! If you don’t know what to say shut the fuck up!

12. Don’t tell her to hide it because “what will people say”

13. Don’t tell her to find strength in God, where the fuck was the bastard when she was raped? 

14. Don’t tell her to forget about it! Because if she could forget about it, she wouldn’t be dreaming about it over and over! All the men she has slept with would not have taken the bastard’s face! She wouldn’t be so hard to love! She would be believing of people and trusting! Don’t say that shit!

15. If you don’t know what to say, shut the fuck up and just be there for her! 

16. Don’t ever call her words like bitch! No matter what she has done!

17. Be gentle with her

18. Show her love 

19. I believe you!

20. I love you! I am here for you! I may not have all the answers but I am here for you!

It seems rapists in general can smell a rape victim, like how once you have been bitten by a dog other dogs can smell it somehow and want to bite you again. Warn her about this. Other motherfuckers will try her others maybe become successful. Arm her! Let her carry a gun, a knife or whatever to protect herself. Let this not harden her though. Teach her to forgive, at her pace! Help her heal her wounds at her pace! Allow her to be angry but teach her about forgiveness too. To forgive herself mostly because she will carry that guilt for a long time. 

Most important Forgive yourself too 

Note to self: one day share this with mom, not today; but one day.

rachel 

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